Not everything is what it appears to be. I’m not, and neither are you.

It ain’t about having a big dick as much as it is about having a big heart.

Ive always believed that I have a manifest destiny, so here I am.

Intellectual discourse is fine but I prefer intellectual intercourse any day of the week, and if I'm lucky, nights too.

I’m a charitable kind of guy. I’ll give ya all the shit you think you can handle, and just a bit more to rub it all in.

There’s a lot of judgmental people out there, and they’re mostly mental in their judgment of me.

There was a time when all things were equal, a time long ago, a time before man appeared and made everything his.

Hope has to spring eternal when winter lasts 11 months out of the year.

Reality is a swift river current pulling you along and you never stop to think to fight against it, to climb out of the river.

I’m not afraid to fight or even die for what I believe in. I’m not so sure I’d be willing to fight for what you believe in, much less die for it.

If granted grace to lie my tired old soul along this journey, I would not do so.

There comes a time to dream and there follows a time to wake.

Sometimes all you can do is lay in bed thinking how much you want to slap the shit out of someone. I get that! My advice, get you groove on, do what you were born to do and let the assholes wither on their own rotting vine.

Not everything deserves to make a second appearance and not everybody deserves a second chance.

All  great men are driven by a desire to be loved, good men are driven by their love.

Death has more to do with the loss of memory than it does loss of life.

It’s not the entire species I have concerns about, just you.

A surefire way to get rid of a headache is to get rid of what’s causing it. That might be a hint!

There was a time when I was wicked, now I’m just wickless.

The internet is that place between where you are and where you’re going, or better said, between here and there.

The goodness of the human heart has more to  do with belief and conviction and there are those who are lacking.

Clicking your ruby red shoes together doesn’t get you home but it will buy you a one way ticket to a farm down the road.

When nothing seems to go right, remember, it’s Gods plan, not mine

Every once in a while, a man just has to scream out at the world, his mom, his wife, his job and his kids, then figure it’s useless and go fishing.

Chances are, you’re not the wild thing you think you are. If you’re going to argue the point, do so by doing something wild, child!

Some men choose to measure their worth by the size of their dick, some by their accomplishments, some by their social standing and many by the size of their bank accounts. Me? My friends measure mine, and they don’t let me forget it.

Of all the people I know, take a bit of solace in the fact that I don’t know you.

I’m a Holy man and far, very far from home.

One good turn can  put you on a circular path to your dream destination.

Swaaaaaaeeeeetttt Jesus, The world ain’t big enough for both you and yours. Time to move on or enjoy the waters washing over you.

Damn, sometimes the hand is too small, then the universe opens up and unclogs the clog.

I had a visitor last night, she woke me up, cuddled next to me and whispered in my ear, ‘You’re getting old, hurry up, I’m waiting’.

If you knew what you needed, you wouldn’t want it so toss the fantasies about Annbabella

Some shit just never gets done because no one wants to do it, thus came the creation of ‘shit jobs’ which you and I are paid dearly to do.

Given the severity of your situation, I’d recommend a lobotomy. In fact, step into my shop...

Aint enough for a man to have any ol’ gun. You gotta have a big one. Ask any man w/ a small dick, they’ll tell ya.

Don’t bother wasting your life away, your boss is doing a fine job of doing it for you.

Few things are worth the while, but over all, I think life, and living life, is worth the time spent.

Sometimes a man has a big thing in his hands and little things on his mind.

You do know, that everything goes around, comes around until the circle is squared, right?

A smart man will argue his position with you. An intelligent man will listen to your argument.

I prefer porn to guns, in fact, I don’t mind watching a couple of real rabbits every now and than.



If you like short stories, check out my  Amazon Kindle Authors page. You can’t go wrong for 99 cents.

or ‘I  told you so!’

Cry 121
or ‘I f*cking told you So’.

rob paxtons social commentary







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Social Commentary and Satire, the likes of which you won’t find elsewhere. will be transitioning to over the next few months.